Whenever I start chatting with someone online the conversation inevitably turns to sex and people are curious to know what my fantasies and fetishes are and how I came to enjoy the things that I do. I often find myself repeating the details of my sexual past and so I thought I would use my blog to chronicle the details of my journey from a naive nymphet to the kink-loving lady I am today.This is going to be a long story so I will write some when I can and I ask you to be patient as the details unfold.
Part I: I Meet My Ex
When I met my ex almost 26 years ago he was only the third man I ever had sex with. I was almost nineteen and travelling across-country with a girlfriend and her boyfriend. We decided to stay in Texas and earn some money so, for some unknown reason, I got a job as a waitress in a topless club. Rick walked in the club one night and sat at one of my tables. I loved his big blue eyes and long, thick, dark hair from the moment I saw him. He started flirting with me and asked me for my phone number. When I told him I was just passing through and staying in a motel, he offered to drive me home after work. He seemed like a nice guy and, like I said, I loved those big blue eyes, so I agreed to let him drive me to the motel.Back then I was very much into sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll (now I'm just into sex and rock-and-roll) so I made love to him that night and ended up moving in with him a couple of weeks later. Although I was working in a topless bar I was very naive and shy about exposing my breasts in the club. Rick encouraged me to be more open and, with his encouragement, I started dancing and stripping at the club. For some reason he loved to watch me strip and didn't get jealous when other men showered me with attention. When I asked him about it he told me that he and his ex-wife had been into swinging for a few years before their divorce and he thought it was a turn-on and a compliment to know that other men found me sexually attractive. The more I danced and the more attention I received from the men at the club, the better I felt about myself and the more comfortable I got playing the part of a flirt and a stripper.
Part II: My Introduction To Swinging
A couple of months into our relationship Rick and I were getting ready to go out dancing and he told me he wanted me to wear something slutty. I was starting to feel more comfortable about flirting and dancing at the club but I still felt shy about dressing that way in public, and I told him so. He proceeded to tell me how much he missed swinging and he asked me if I'd try it just this once. He said that the swinger's club that him and his ex went to was a nice place and he begged me to keep an open mind and go there with him. He said that if I didn't like it, he'd never ask me to do it again. So, with great trepidation, I dressed like I was going to work and we drove off toward the swinger's club.The club was an off-premise club which means that there was no overt sexual activity allowed on-premise but, as I soon learned, there was alot of discreet erotic action happening all over the place. I found out that some couples hosted private parties at their homes after-hours and couples would caravan to the parties from the club. We got to the club early so at first,it seemed like any other up-scale dance club. As the night progressed and I got a few drinks under my belt I was doing alot of dancing with many different men. A few women asked me to dance too, but I had never been with a woman and I wasn't ready for that yet, so I graciuosly declined their requests.To make a long story short, a couple invited us to a party at their house and, in my alcohol-induced reverie, I hesitantly agreed to go.It was the first time I had sex with more than one man in a night and in fact, I doubled the number of men I had sex with up until that point in my life by screwing three different guys (four, if you count me screwing Rick when we got home) that night. I guess I enjoyed myself because before I knew it we became regulars at the club and the more we went there, the more I started playing with women. I soon liked being with women so much that I began to realize that I was bisexual. That was the beginning of a phase in my life where I consciencely, and eagerly sought out women at the club to have sex with.
Part III: I Find Rick's Porn Stash
A few months after I moved in with Rick I found his stash of porn. He had it in a foot-locker tucked back in the corner of his closet. He was working out of town when I found it so I had all the time I needed to look through it. Among the typical men's magazines were some hardcore picture magazines on a variety of topics, from lesbian sex, to hardcore fucking pics, to one showing women masterbating with a variety of objects, including fruits, vegetables, hair brushes, bottles, and various other objects. There were also a few XXX videotapes, but what especially caught my attention were a large number of erotic storybooks that were published by some of the mainstream men's magazines. I'm sure you've seen them, they're the ones where readers write in and tell about all their kinky experiences. I started reading some of the stories and masterbated as I read them. When I was putting everything back in the foot-locker I noticed a couple of paperback books buried under a pile of magazines. When I pulled one out I was shocked by the title and the picture on the cover. It was titled something like "Barnyard Desires" and had a picture of a young woman wearing a daisey dukes outfit while riding a horse bareback toward a barn, with a goat and boar pig following behind . My heart raced as I put it down and reached for the other paperback. It's title was just as shocking as the first, but the picture on the cover wasn't quite as kinky. The name of the book was something like, "Slut For Caesar" and the picture on the cover was of a naked young woman lovingly hugging a big german sheperd. My heart was racing when I realized what the books were about and, without even looking at them, I quickly put them back just as I found them and put the foot-locker back in the closet.
Over the next couple of months Rick was working out of town during the week most of the time and whenever I was feeling horny I'd pull out the footlocker, look at the magazines, read some of the sexy stories, and masterbate myself to orgasm. Initially I avoided the nasty paperbacks like the plague but eventually my curiosity got the best of me and I started to peruse the forbidden books. I was shocked by what I read. I couldn't believe that there were women who actually did those nasty things with animals and liked it as much as the women in the books apparantly did. As perverted as it initially seemed to me, it was like passing a car wreck on the highway and I couldn't pry my eyes from between the kinky pages of those nasty books. Surprisingly, the more I read about this taboo subject the more it aroused me, and before I realized it, I was going straight to the paperbacks and ignoring the "normal" porn. I think that the "forbidden" aspect of it appealed to me and the kinkiness of the acts excited me in ways that I couldn't explain.
When my ex was working out of town I got into the habit of coming home from work in the wee hours of the morning, taking a long bubble bath, drinking a little wine, and then crawling into bed with the paperbacks and my vibrator for a leisurely session of orgasmic satisfaction. It wasn't unusual for me to stay awake until dawn and then sleep well into the afternoon (my shift at work didn't begin until 5 PM). One afternoon, after one such night of self-pleasuring, I overslept for work and rushed out of the apartment, carelessly leaving the paperbacks and my toys laying on the floor next to the bed. My ex came home while I was at work, saw the way I left the bedroom, and put two-and-two together. He knew that I was masterbating to the kinky books and when I got home from work he asked me if I'd been reading them. I couldn't deny it and we ended up having a long talk about sex and our relationship. During the course of our conversation he told me that he and his first wife had been introduced to this kinky fetish by the wife of a couple they were swinging with. It seems this woman was very much into it and put on a show for them. Rick said his ex tried it, liked it, and did it with a few different dogs during the last year or so of their marriage. He also said that he thought it was the sluttiest thing a woman could do and he confessed that he used to love watching his ex do it and then fucking her sloppy pussy after the dog finished. I was shocked to hear that, but aroused by the kinkiness of it, and the sex we enjoyed after that talk was some of the hottest sex we ever had. However, since we lived in an apartment and didn't have a "friend" to take it any further with, it was something that I continued to be curious about it and it remained just an erotic curiosity for me for several years to come - but the seeds were sown for my eventual journey down that knotty road.
Part IV: My First Gangbang
I only worked at the topless bar for six months or so before I quit and got a "normal" job and, except for competing in a couple of strip club "amateur nights" and a wet t-shirt contest, I left that part of my life behind me forever. About five years after Rick and I met we were still swinging and at that point I was more into women than men, but I was still having sex with alot of different men and enjoying myself. One Thanksgiving-eve, just before we moved to Florida, I had my first gang-bang. I don't remember why, but we didn't go to the swing club we normally went to but instead, Rick decided to check out an on-premise party house that someone had told us about. We found out when we got there that Wednesday was "gangbang night" and the man at the door did his best to get us inside. He told us that most of the guys were college-aged because there was a big college game in town and he would waive the fifty dollar "club membership" for my husband if he brought me in to party.
With Rick's encouragement, we went in. The host fixed us a drink and then showed us around. There were two other women already participating in seperate bedrooms when we arrived. One of them seemed like she didn't really want to be there but she was young and sexy and willing to lay there and let guys fuck her so she had guys waiting in line. The other woman was very pretty. She was tall and slender but several years older than me and she was putting on quite a show as she screwed one guy and sucked another while several other naked men stood around stroking their cocks, watching, and waiting their turn. There were probably fifteen-to-twenty men there when we arrived but at least a dozen more would come and go during the maybe three hours that we were there. Another woman showed up as we were finishing our second drink but she went straight to another one of the bedrooms as several men followed her like little baby ducks.
We were still in the living room, sitting on the couch and making small talk with seven or eight guys who were lingering around us, some naked and some clothed. My ex was doing most of the talking and in his not so subtle way he let them know that he loved to watch me act slutty and that my mouth and pussy were available for their pleasure. He also let them know that my pooper was off-limits. As I finished my second drink a naked young man scooted in next to me and started unbuttoning my blouse. Another guy stepped in front of me, kneeled down, and pulled my mini-skirt off. The guy in front of me reached around my waist and scooted my ass to the edge of the couch. Then, with his tongue hanging half-way out of his mouth, his face went towards my pussy. He paused momentarily, looked me in the eyes and said, "Do you mind if I eat this thing before it gets all nasty?"
I'm not sure if was the alcohol or all the sex and testosterone in the air but I was very nervous - but at the same time, I was horny and eager to just get on with it. "Sure", I said softly to the guy, "Go for it."
As I got my pussy eaten by one guy, the guy who took off my blouse stood on the couch next to me and shoved his cock in my mouth. The guy eating my pussy really knew what he was doing. He licked me, nibbled and sucked my clit, and finger-fucked me as I finished sucking off the first guy. Another guy took his place and I had a new cock in my mouth. I was so horny I must have been sucking good because it only took the second guy a few minutes before he surprised me with such a big load of cum that I couldn't swallow fast enough. Some of it ran down my chin and onto my chest. Before I could do anything about it another guy stuck his cock in my mouth and started stroking it.
I opened one eye and glanced around the room. Almost all the men were naked now and standing around me, staring at me and stroking their cocks. I heard voices coming from the direction of the front door and looked in that direction. The door was open and our host was talking to a few guys who were staring right at me. Fortunately the orgies we'd attended had made me very accustomed to having sex in front of an audience so I just closed my eye and continued to enjoy myself. Suddenly the guy who was eating me stopped and asked me if he could fuck me doggystyle. I don't mind giving blowjobs but I'd much rather get fucked, so I obediently said, "Yea, sure," and got into fucking for awhile and took a break from giving blowjobs.
We got down on the floor in the middle of the living room and the pussy-eating guy started fucking me doggystyle. After he was through with me another guy took his place and for the next two hours the men kept coming, I kept fucking and sucking them, and I loved being the object and the center of their sexual energy.
Some women might think that being used as a sex object like that would make them feel used and degraded but in fact, just the opposite was true for me. As those men fucked me and as I sucked them, I not only felt alive, sexy, and incrediblyly aroused, but I also felt a sense of ego and empowerment. It was as if my mouth, my pussy, and my entire being was the focus of those men's sexual desire. My naked body was like a sort of hypnotic charm that put those men in my power and made them want to ravish me. One of the men I was sucking jokingly (I think) called me a sex-goddess and, I must admit, I did get the feeling that I was being worshipped by all of those men - and everytime one of them had an orgasm I considered it a compliment and an affirmation of my sexual power over them.
Another thing I realized that night was that men love my blowjobs. When we first started swinging I already had experience giving them, but after being with Rick and swinging for several years I guess I got pretty good at it. I learned how to deep-throat on my ex-husband's cock and it came in handy that night of the gangbang. One thing I liked about deep-throating was that when the guy would cum he'd practically shoot it right down my throat and I barely tasted it. The trick to swallowing while deep-throating is, it's not like a shot of tequila where you swallow it all at once. Instead, when the guy starts to cum, you swallow constantly, like you're drinking a glass of water, and it goes right down to your tummy.
As my gangbang was winding down I deep-throated one guy and all of a sudden I got popular again. A crowd quickly formed to watch me deep throat another guy, then another, and another before I called it a night. I must have sucked-off a dozen different men that night and fucked almost as many. One thing I noticed was the men's orgasms seemed more intense when I was blowing them, as compared to when they were fucking me. It helped me to understand why men love blowjobs so much and I began to realize that my blowjobs were earning me a reputation at the swinger's clubs for being a good slut and a very good fellatrix.
Part V: We Move To Florida
About six years after we met, the company that my ex worked for was doing a big job in Florida and they offered him a sizeable raise and a promotion if we moved there. We decided that we'd do it and, as it turned out, I fell in love with Florida. We're only thirty minutes away from some of the most beautiful beaches in the world and the atmosphere here is more layed back than other places I've lived. There was only one swing club near us and again, it was an off-premise club. We made new friends and I was enjoying the best of both worlds. As Woody Allen once said, "Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night", and for me it meant at least doubling the number of people I had sex with on Saturday nights.
I got a job at an upscale restaurant and my life-long love and natural talent for cooking finally paid off. I quickly became the kitchen manager/sous chef and I was making good money but working long hours. Things were going great for us and although our busy schedules put a crimp in our lovelife, we tried to swing every chance we got. That is, until the swing club we were going to burned down under mysterious circumstances. I'm thinking that was in the very early ninties because the internet wasn't really around yet, so we had to find other ways to meet swingers. Rick started buying swinger magazines and putting ads in them. We did manage to find a few couples to party with but it was a very slow and often disappointing process. We met one gorgeous woman named Linda who was married, bi, and a few years older than me. She partied with us without her husband and at first she said she wasn't interested in having sex with Rick but he eventually screwed her a few times. She didn't mind if he tagged along on our "dates" and watched us having sex. My relationship with her lasted about a year (until she and her husband split apart and she moved away). Of all the people we had swung with at that point, I never developed a strong emotional bond with anyone, it had been all about the sex. But with Linda I did become emotionally involved and it was very hard on me when she went out of my life. That was the closest thing I ever had to a lesbian relationship.
Part VI: We Find New Ways To Add Spice
With no swing club in town and the swinger's magazines not bringing us many new friends we began to look at other ways to spice up our sexlife. We started going to a nudist resort near our house and we discovered their "bare as you dare" dances on Wednesday nights. With our busy work schedules it was hard for us to get there during the week but when we did go, we almost always ended up hooking up with other couples and partying with them. About the time my relationship with Linda was ending we rented a porn movie titled, "The Story of O". If you aren't familiar with it it's about a woman ("O") whose boyfriend (Rene') sends her off to be trained as a sexual submissive. Rene' sends her to a château where she is is blindfolded, chained, whipped, branded, pierced, made to wear a mask, and taught to be constantly available for oral, vaginal, and anal intercourse with an elite group of men. O grants permission beforehand for everything that occurs, and her permission is contantly requested by the men in the group who wish to use her for their sexual pleasure. O's love for her boyfriend is so unconditional that she is proud to be his willing slave and eager to do whatever pleases him.When she returns from the chateau, Rene' (for some unexplained reason) wants O to learn to serve someone whom she does not love, and someone who does not love her, so he turns her over to a more dominant master (Sir Stephen) to continue her training as a submissive. In the end, O and Sir Stephen fall in love. She agrees to be branded and pierced to show that she belongs to him and she willingly and eagerly services other men at his request.
That movie had a big effect on our sexual relationship. Gradually, we began to experiment more and more with our dom and sub roles. I am naturally sub and I loved my ex unconditionally, so I could relate strongly to O's willingness to do (almost) anything to sexually satisfy her lover. We started fooling around with B&D and blindfolds, and I must admit that it was somehow very liberating to surrender sexual control to someone you know and love. When I wore a blindfold, the sensitivity of my other senses (especially touch) seemed to increase tremendously and the anticipation of not knowing what was going to happen next was very exciting. I started calling him Master during sex and he called me slut. Instead of being insulted by that word, I was proud to be his slut and I wanted to be the best slut in the world.
Part VII: We Explore My Submissive Side
The thing about advertising in swinger's magazines is that almost all the mail you get is from single men. For a long time those letters were ignored, but with Linda leaving the picture, it left us with more "dateless" Saturday nights and the pleasure of our B&D activities had opened us up to the possibility of even more daring sexcapades. So one Saturday night, while I was tied up and blindfolded, and Rick was fucking me with a longneck beer bottle, he told me that he wanted me to be submissive for another man. If I hadn't been so horny at that moment I might have had a different reaction, but hearing him say that and imagining a total stranger "forcing" me to perform for him sexually made me even hornier than I already was and I had a mind-blowing orgasm.
In the after-glow of my orgasms, my ex told me that he had been talking to a guy who wrote to us and that he sounded like someone I might like to play with. The guy's name was Mark, and Rick showed me his (fully-clothed) picture and his letter. He looked good and his letter was thoughtful and well-written. Mark was about Rick's age, single, had his own photography studio, and he and his ex-girlfriend had been into B&D, so he was experienced with a submissive woman. Since I wasn't as horny as I was when Rick first mentioned it, I was very unsure about being submissive for a stranger - but it did sound very erotic. I told my ex of my apprehension and he assured me that he'd always be there and he wouldn't let the guy do anything to me that I didn't want to do and that I could use a "safe-word" if he told me to do something I didn't want to do. So I agreed to go along with it.
My ex called Mark and arranged for him to meet us the following Saturday night. The plan was for us to rent a condo at the beach for a night and have Mark join us there. Rick and I checked into the place that Saturday afternoon, hung out at the beach, had a few drinks, and I anxiously anticipated what I was getting myself into. I spent the last couple of hours primping for my mystery lover and I was more nervous than I'd been about anything sexual in a very long time. Rick had shaved my pussy smooth the night before and after I showered, he helped me pick out what I'd be wearing when Mark arrived. It wasn't much of an outfit, red high heels, black, thigh-high fishnet stockings, a red garter, and a black and red corset that left my breasts exposed. We brought our fur-lined wrist and ankle cuffs, our blindfold, and several of my dildos and vibrators.
A few minutes before nine, Rick left me alone in the condo with a fresh margarita and went to the bar next door to meet Mark. He told me he'd be back in a half hour and, if Mark was acceptable, he'd give him our unit number and ask him to come over and join us.(To be continued...)